“Mom, I’m not as smart as I used to be.”
I will never forget my youngest daughter’s statement after her first day back to school following brain surgery.
After many personal trials that had initially delayed graduation, she was supposed to graduate the year before, in Spring 2014. Then, just prior to the ending semester, finally at the end of her schooling, a cyst in her brain was discovered. The required brain surgery was the “open up the skull” type of surgery.
Yesterday she participated in the graduation ceremony at UC Davis.
Today I am still digesting the enormity of this all. What an incredible and courageous accomplishment. Chelsea’s journey reflects a life lesson I am compelled to share. You won’t hear a lot about my kids on my blog; I greatly respect their privacy. This has been my policy ever since they were little.
But with my youngest daughter’s permission I am sharing a bit.
May it encourage you deeply.
On the top of her graduation cap she wrote:
The walking ceremony was symbolic of her journey.
Often times we look at others’ lives without realizing what goes on “behind the scenes.” We see highlights and the sound bytes of success. We probably don’t have a clue about the struggles or the choices or the work.
Sometimes we may be tempted to look at our own lives in a comparing light. This is really an illusion. To compare and stand in jealousy is a waste of time. There are many who have struggled to move forward, step by step. They have continued on, reclaiming what was lost or never given. These are the warriors; they make decisions to go on.
In Chelsea’s situation, it was not an easy ride.
But she did it.
Yes, she did.
And we are all so very proud of her.
Support and grace may appear from many places. Here are a few photos of some of hers. But there are so many other places and people of great help that are not represented in these few photos.
Life is complex.
Gratitude can be an endless reflection. I gaze with awe at the goodness that is in our lives…
-
- An amazing team
-
- A loving family
-
- The gift of loving ones
Inside I am sobbing deep tears.
I was widowed when Chelsea was just over a year old. She always longed for a father. About ten years ago an extraordinary gentleman and his wife came into her life. He is her “adopted father.” He and his wife are true gifts.
I stand in awe at all the grace we have known. My two other incredible daughters, sons-in-law, families… each life is so diverse and so very important. Tragedy can be a part of us.
But ease in life doesn’t bring happiness.
I would say to you, “Keep showing up. Keep going. You will find courage in strange places.”
And looking back, may you all be able to say, as Chelsea did:
Braver than I believed, Stronger than I knew. Smarter than I thought.
Take a lesson from Chelsea’s model of amazing.
(c) Diane L. Mathias, 2015 All rights reserved. (Revised: Jun, 2019)
Wow…what an incredible story of courage and determination and a reminder that we are all much more than we may think.
I absolutely agree with you! For my daughter this was a HUGE walk in courage. It’s one of those times (and I think we all must have them) when we look back and say, with much amazement, “How did I every get thru that?” I marvel at her. I really do. Thank you for your comment 😀
Hi Annie,
I’m so glad that I came over to investigate. I actually thought the photo was of you in your graduation, so all the more fascinating to read this journey taken by your daughter.
I can hear your calm and measured voice sharing this deeply emotional and uplifting story about the challenge that you and Chelsea and your entire family faced together.
It’s powerful the way that you broaden out the lessons gathering your readers in so that we can each take a moment, and a deep breath, recalling how we got HERE.
Thank you. Thank you Chelsea for “getting through that”
Thank you so much, Donna, for your comments here. I agree, there is so much wisdom to be gained when we look at our “back stories.” And by calling these to mind, recalling the strength and courage…I find this brings back that sense of confidence. Even though we face really terrifying situations we can stand and say, “Yes, I can do this.” We are indeed “braver than we thought.”